Wish
by Shadowy Star
Summary: New Year’s customs may differ on Erna but their meaning does not. DxG


**Wish**

by Shadowy Star

December 2008

Disclaimer: I don't own the Coldfire trilogy. It belongs to C.S. Friedman. I do own this story. Do not archive or translate or otherwise use it without permission.

**A/N:** New Year's customs may differ on Erna but their meaning does not.

I'm posting this as my Xmas fic for this year. Merry Xmas and a Happy New Year to everyone out there!

* * *

Damien looked out of the window.

Behind the glass surface the snow was silently falling, covering everything with a fluffy blanket of whiteness.

It was only minutes to the midnight of the New Year.

Here in Ganji a New Year custom existed that could only be performed when it was snowing. If you make a wish and catch a snowflake on New Year's Eve, when the bells start ringing midnight, and if it doesn't melt on your palm _while_ they are ringing, the new year will grant you your wish. Damien remembered a conversation with Gerald back then onboard the Golden Glory about customs and tradition and society and why the latter needed the former two to function. He remembered the other smile slightly when Damien told him of Ganji's New Year's customs.

It was a custom mainly for children, and Damien remembered catching snowflakes himself when he'd been a child. It was, of course, an impossible trial. No matter how cold one's hands were they were still warmer than the snow. Which explained why his wish had never been granted. Always, always had he wished for the same thing: someone to hold, to care for, someone he could love with all of his heart, and treasure above everything else, and protect from all harm. Someone all for himself.

It was a selfish wish, he knew, and the Church taught its priests and priestesses not to be selfish, and so he had stopped to wish for that somewhere around his fourth year of education. But the wish had never died inside him. And now…

He startled awake from his reveries when the first bell started ringing. It was a childish custom, he knew…

He opened the door and stepped outside, stretching out his left hand, palm upward and open to the skies. In silence he watched snowflakes spiraling down slowly, melting quickly. He closed his eyes at the pain, tears flowing down his cheeks. Would his wish never be granted?

Suddenly he felt cold metal instead of snow on his skin as a small item was placed into his hand, and the very next moment warm fingers curled his own cold ones around it. Startled, he opened his eyes and hand to look down and discovered a snowflake shaped silver pendant in his palm. His eyes snapped up to the owner of those warm fingers that still were curled around his hand and his breath caught.

His gaze was met by beautiful black eyes, looking steadily into his own. A lot of emotions lurked in those eyes but on the surface there were only guilt and sadness.

"I'm sorry," the young man said, his words regret and apology both.

Damien remembered how to breathe. And did.

"Don't be," he said softly, placing his right hand onto the other's fingers on his own and squeezing them gently. "I've forgiven you long ago."

The black eyes widened in surprise. Then, slowly, as if unsure if his touch would be welcome, Gerald raised his hand to wipe away the tears that still were streaming down Damien's cheeks.

"Damien, don't…"

At the touch of those warm fingers something inside Damien broke. He knew it was probably a huge mistake but he just couldn't help. Not even when his life depended on it. He freed his hands, closing his hand around the pendant so he wouldn't lose it, and pulled Gerald into a desperate embrace. When he felt slender arms around him he only pressed the other man closer to him.

They stood like this for a couple of heartbeats before Damien pulled back, averting his eyes, his arms dropping from Gerald's waist.

"Why are you here?" he asked tonelessly, clutching the pendant with such a force its edges bit sharply into his palm, almost drawing blood.

"To stay." Gerald's eyes were crystal clear and completely honest and his tone betrayed –anxiety? "I'm here to stay."

Breath caught in Damien's throat again. "For how long?" he finally managed.

Gerald smiled openly, and his eyes were full of relief. "Forever, Damien. Forever."

Damien raised his own hand to touch that beloved face. And then he moved closer, winding his hand into Gerald's fine black hair, and crushed their lips together.

Gerald's arms instantly wound themselves around his waist again, urgent hands stroking his back almost desperately.

They kissed for what seemed an eternity before Gerald drew back, only a little, maintaining the contact of their bodies.

The bells were still ringing.

"Shouldn't you make a wish?" he asked gently, one warm palm cupping Damien's cheek.

"No need to," Damien answered, smiling into that touch, and stroked a stray lock from Gerald's face. "My wish has been already granted."

Tears were now in Gerald's eyes, clinging to his long black lashes, not yet falling.

"But you could," Damien added.

The softest of gasps and now those tears did fall, and Gerald firmly shook his head, leaning in. "What could I wish for?" he whispered, his lips touching Damien's again. "Everything I ever wanted I now got."

They stood there kissing and holding each other long after the bells stopped ringing. Their tears had dried somewhere in the process, and their clothes began to get soaked. They paid no attention to that. Only a long, long measure of time later did they part, and only for just as long as it took to get inside.

The door closed behind them without a sound, adding another silence to the scenery.

And the snow continued to fall.

FIN

* * *

**Extra notes:**

(1) The custom described in this story once existed in some regions of Russia. There is even a song (well, actually from a movie as far as I know) about it: 'Snezhynka' which means 'Snowflake'.

…When the young year arrives

and the old one slips away

hide a fragile snowflake in your hand

and make a wish.

Look out with hope into the night

don't close your hand too tightly

and ask for everything you dreamed of,

and wish for it…


End file.
